Wednesday 12 March 2008

The Life And Death Of A Pimple


You may be a little grossed out by this title or you may be secretly elated that I have finally chosen to talk about your secret fetish.
I’m not going to tell you how to clear up your pimples, though for future reference Calamine Lotion and Toothpaste work really well. I am going to tell you the tale of the pimple near my lip, gross, I know, but I brave the tough subjects. Forget about these pansies documenting the riots in Kenya or anything else Blood Diamond related; I talk about the real issues.

Where is my Pulitzer!?!?!

Now, you may have noticed in my video announcing my adventure to SXSW, that I had this weird bump on the upper corner of my lip. It was the remnants of a nasty pimple that likes to grace its face to the world every now and then, and always at the wrong times.

Nothing but trouble, I can tell you; you can’t spend hours in front of a mirror hiding away from the public eye while on a plane…you have to face the music, the eyes that dart away from the Offender and the embarrassment you felt when you were 11 and received the first bump on a cheek. This brings me to my tale, my Gross tale.

When I was 11, I noticed that I had this bump on my lip. I poked at it a bit, but it didn’t go away and I just assumed it was some sort of weird lip thing or a freckle.
Imagine me, younger, walking around with a tiny little bump on my lip through years of my life. It became me. It achieved my middle name; it could have grown feelers or a brain during all the time it was on my face.
Sometime during my first years of high school, the little bump seemed irritated and I decided to investigate.
I poked and I prodded, I squeezed and pressed, and pinched, and suddenly…glory came out. Yes, we all know the satisfying yet squeamish sight of puss or whatever is going on underneath your skin. How extraordinary. I had been carrying around a pimple for years and did not even realize it. Even my Mum didn’t think anything unusual of it, since it was so tiny.

…and uh, yeah… That’s my story.

…It did sound more interesting in my head.

…Well, this is awkward.

8 comments:

EarleWidrich said...

That's gotta be like some kinda pimple record. But I can so picture you at 11 having a little pimple name Alexandra on your lip. :.)

adro44 said...

Wow! You know you are comedy-genius (don't roll your eyes!) when you can keep me on the edge of my seat and away from important work over a story about a pimple. I hope that doesn't sound sarcastic, because honestly, I was laughing and relating the entire time. Except for me, it was one on my nose that lasted from the 5th grade until the 7th grade . . . almost no lie.

It's funny how everyone gets zits and yet everyone is embarrassed by them . . . you'd think that we'd realize that they're just some natural thing. Oh well.

Good story Cait, I'll be ready for the next one when you get it posted.

Thanks! :-)

Hema said...

hahaha im such a looserr

i checked my rss feeds and urs was updated so i went to it but then it said it no longer existed so i IMMEDIATELY went to ur yt profile and tried to comment (but i think u set it to only friends can comment) and then scroled up and saw that u just changed the nam eof it =.='

JoMiMo555 said...

A topic I am so familiar with, yet so humiliated by.

Sigh.

jp3d said...

piplegasm!

Unknown said...

My god is that picture disturbing...
I know it from somewhere but i can't remember what from o.O

Chris in the Studio said...

"I'm Cosmopolitan, I never got or get pimples"he he. J.K. What did you expect, a doctoral thesis?

Unknown said...

I empathize with you Caitlin. When I was in high school, I developed an enormous pimple on the end of my nose. It was about the size of Texas. My mean and evil classmates laughed at me and called me Rudolph.

I hope this makes you feel better.

Totals