Wednesday 18 March 2009

Cool Spring Air, Opinions and A Quiet Night In

There are so many things I want to talk about, that just don't do well on a public blog.

Isn't that sad?

Sometimes, I wish that I had a greater level of anonymity, like I had when I was 16. I was quite public with most of my thoughts on my old blogs, and some people didn't really like it. Or they just thought I was being a silly girl. And I am most of the time.

I am very much enjoying Internet Life lately. I had a lot of fun at Rhett and Link's shoot for their new video (coming out next Monday). I was over-excited about the whole thing, and sometimes that level of energy can turn people off or confuse them, but on that day every one else seemed in a super happy mood too, and I remember laughing a lot.

I really enjoyed taking photos of the other YouTubers splashing around the pool, they are all so expressive. It's very fun to capture. I am looking forward to updating my camera one day, so I can really control the focus.

I fear all the shivering in the cool Spring sun might have made me sick unfortunately. I'm controlling it with Vitamin C and, as I type between mouthfuls, chicken broth (with lots of pepper) and some ginger noodles.

I also realized, while trying to make the broth more enjoyable, that I really don't know how to cook those floppy little mexican wrappy things. Wow. Well done, Caitlin. Good luck with your ignorance.

I'm a little annoyed with myself right now. For reasons I'd rather not divulge. I just always seem to come off the wrong way and misrepresent myself to friends, when I'm really just easygoing and couldn't really give a fuck. I don't have time for anything, and yet I steal so many minutes with caring about other peoples opinions on me.

I love nothing more than to analyze everything, but it does me no good at all, it simply drives me mad.

Anyway, I'm excited for my quiet night in. I'm going to get all my work done, and watch The City and Gossip Girl - for the City, of course, not the silly characters and lack of story-line.

Have you read the latest Vanity Fair? I suggest that you do so, it's a great read! I very much enjoyed the articles on the American Dream and how, through time, it has become something entirely trivial. And all that Bernie Madoff business, what a drama! I'm very glad that I'm minus $150 in the bank by my own causes right now. And I will never, ever, ever Invest. I'll earn what I earn and that is that.

Anyway, that's enough nonsense for tonight. Do you like my new "look" for my blog? This person, MacoMaco is kind enough to let people use his content as long as they are acknowledged. Very awesome, indeed. I wanted something that summed up all I want out of life. Film and Large Fields.

Film and Large Fields.

Love from The Alien Hatching Within The Body and the Messers Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot & Prongs.

P.S: I just realized that my roommates are like, the only people I hang out with.

20 comments:

cici said...

it was just like an hour ago i made a mental note to check you out more often and then you update your blog. you always make the longest and deepest blogs and i don't read them often enough. you're cool.

Brent said...

When cooking "those floppy little mexican wrappy things": make sure you have all your desirable contents prepped and cooked first; then place it in the middle of a oven-warm tortilla. The trick is to fold it over first and then tuck in the sides; continue folding it 'like a doobie' and VOILA! You got yourself a Wrap!

I'm amazed that you say things that you rather not divulge, but your recent Tumblr and Tweet posts say more about you than most would ever know!

And yes, I really enjoy what you have done lately to your Blog and Tumblr - it looks smart and professional. Just like you!

Anonymous said...

i love you :)

Anonymous said...

I've felt the same way about my public blogs. You just can't get out what you want since people judge, don't understand or just for the simple fact that things are hard to convey in online form. I'm sure you know this but it's easy to have a level of anonymity on the internet if you really try though. The only problem is then no one pays any attention or the wrong people do. Like the trolls. There is nothing wrong with writing about your own thoughts though. That's what blogging is meant to be about even moreso when done in anonymity.

There's nothing wrong with being over-excited about anything in life no matter how small. Life is about happiness and should never be anything less than that. That's what you need when you start taking others' opinions in. It's not about not giving a fuck but just being able to brush their opinions (or what you think their opinions are) off. If you don't want to analyze every little thing then don't. Appreciate every little thing you have and ignore that which has no effect on your life.

As for the Vanity Fair articles on the American dream. I wouldn't read too much into that. Because i'm sure the majority of Americans outside the materialism's sphere of influence have never seen that as the American dream. You should make it a goal to live in an small American town nearly in the middle of nowhere some time in your life. Even if for six months or so. It'd definitely expand your outlook on what American life is and why we have these dreams and pride in our America. The America where we take life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness to heart.

Because life is free. Liberty, available to all, has no cost. And happiness is what's within ourselves and not in the materials we see too many on this nation relying on. Sure, maybe we're too conservative. Sure, maybe we haven't progressed enough economically. But culturally we're richer than most anywhere else. Something Vanity Fair writers may hardly ever understand.

Beans said...

i say do as you like. write about what’s important to you, even if it is personal. if you must, start a new blog for just those personal entries. i think only one person has ever looked at my blog, but it’s cathartic. as for people’s opinions, don’t give them a second thought. opinions are like voodoo curses, the only have power over you if you give them credence.
sorry to hear you are not feeling 100%, good to hear you are having fun online again.

Chris in the Studio said...

"Analyze this!"

Hugs,, Your amazing,
Kisses Your inspiring,
Hugs I'm proud of you
Kisses You fucking rock.

Chris in the Studio said...

oh yeah, one more thing. You should hang out with others from time to time.

Open mic, side walk Cafe Monday.

Tatiana may come with her gtr.:)

Mikael W said...

Quiet nights in rock from time to time. Btw, I really like reading your blogs, so just go with the flow and write when you feel like it :)

Anonymous said...

I love your new layout, Caitlin! 'Tis beautiful. ^_^

You live in NYC. I'm jealous.

Anonymous said...

You can Hang out with me but that would be weird cause we don't know each other. You could turn out to be serial killer and I dont know if I could deal with that... let alone survive.

Anyways, I know how you feel just don't isolate yourself because you are only hurt you.

Anonymous said...

P.S. I must be brain-dead to type that poorly. My apologies.

james said...

Hello, Caitlin. It seems like you certainly have very much on your mind at the moment. I suppose what you express on a blog corresponds with your reasons for having the blog and the type of connections you wish to form.

Understanding is a never ending journey, one that is propelled by the momentum of our attempts to communicate with one another. When you express yourself, those taking it in will never understand fully what you mean to express. Such is the nature of communication. The difference represents the chasm of understanding that can never be fully traversed. However, only by stepping into the space between can we form a connection and grow closer to another person. It is in that space where connections are formed, and the time we are willing to spend there corresponds to how far we will travel along that journey of understanding with that person. There have been times when I have found myself alone in those spaces between, and while it was frustrating, I was at least able to look back and gain a different perspective on my own nature. However, when people do take those steps together, I personally believe it is representative of the finest of all human endeavors.

I’m not sure any of this is relevant to what you have written, but you have reminded me of something, and the journey continues.

-James

P.S. I hope you don’t get too sick and feel better soon.

Anton Seim said...

P.S. That's a great looking headshot :)

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