Apparently I have one hell of a global footprint - 2.33 planets! I am the Lizard Queen, indeed!

Originally posted on Buzznet.

I don't know if life got simpler. That was a pretty stupid thing to say. Nothing ever gets simpler. I don't believe that there is a simple life. Everything is hard, and when things are easy, there is always another challenge waiting around the corner for you. Life did not get simpler. After buying my PSP, and lots of other things I was staying away from buying I, of course, ended up broke. And I mean broke. I have no money, I am in debt to my grandparents for jeepers sake! I owe my Grandma like a $100, probably more than that, if she kept a tab.

But first things are first. Tomorrow I will audition for The Pajama Game, then I will email Tammy Gosling and ask her to help find me an administration job in the local area. Then I will think. Then on Monday I will be Charlotte, then go to work, where hopefully I will not be murdered by this drug dealer who wants to give me flowers. Heres hoping! :) Then on Tuesday morning, I will ring AEGIS Driving School and have a lesson hopefully on Wednesday or Thursday and then if it goes well, ask to be booked in for a test. Then hopefully I'll get the job (THE job? Geez, WHAT job!!!), quit 7/11 (escape the crazy drug dude), get my licence in however long it takes me to get it...hopefully first time, and then I'll have everyone off my back for a bit. Because I'll finally be getting full time pay, driving myself wherever and becoming an adult, which they have all been praying for.

Then, hopefully, I'll move out. Either with my Mum or with friends and become completely free for a bit. I'll learn how to cook more exciting things than just eggs (though I do cook a mean egg, well actually, it's rather nice. Quite swell. Absolutely spiffing!) and then I'll be able to audition for all those courses and workshops and schools and jobs and get in to all of them, and become great. Then after I've been great for a while, I'll go overseas and grow as a human being...increase my global footprint on the earth, which is apparently already 2.33 planets or something. Can you believe that...in this vast Universe two planets are mine!!! I shall name one Nemo, but I want most of them to be Caitlin Jnr.

No, I think if I had two planets to myself, I would call one: Alberfort and number two: Snozzberry World...and the races will be friends and fly their spaceships back and forth to see each other and have inter-galatic sex and the Alberfort people will have just eyes for faces and huge tongues and be called FezzleLoompers and the Snozzberry World people will have long blonde hair to their feet and huge tonails, that they dig with, and they shall be called SnizzCloppers! And the clouds would be real candy clouds, mmm, the sky would be blue jelly and the earth would be entirely edible...only on one planet, the Snozzberry World...so that the leading cause of death would be obesity, and people would try and escape to Alberfort, causing a terrible surge in population, resulting in mass polution and the extinction of many interesting creatures like the Able-Bodied DeedleBird and the JackingHammer Liger...

Well, if I am the God of those planets I've got to have some kind of plan don't I? I mean World Peace is so boring to watch...plus in a couple of trillion years when they are all wiped out, I can create purple people and dinosaurs that have tea parties! I mean that would be splendid wouldnt it? Just imagine the movie industry trying to turn THAT into a blockbuster...Jurassic Park 4: T-Rex meets the Teapot...it would never sell...damn...

Let's just all pray that I can be Charlotte on Monday okay? Would you pray for me please? I need to be Charlotte!

Love Always and Latro The Rectangle Phallis and The Yellow-ish Odour.