The Pajama Game is the game I'm in...

Originally posted on Buzznet.

Auditioned for The Pajama Game today and got the role I went after, chorus. Which, is good because I'll get to do lots of cool dancing and wear different costumes...and finally put into practise the whole professionalism thing that I've been going on about. It is very easy as a chorus member in a show, to get really laid back about it and treat it as nothing much and still do your part, but not give it your all. I don't want to do that for this show...I want to give 110% every rehearsal and just be good in my own right, even as the girl who just dances and says one line. As long as it's spectacular it doesn't matter.

I think the most important part of that day was talking to Trish, who knows Wendy, her sons girlfriend, and she works in Ashmore for ULA, which stands for something but I forget. They need a junior to take over her job, since she's been promoted...and if I'm lucky I might get the job...I'd be even luckier if I got Charlotte...then I wouldn't really have to worry for a while...wow, it'd be nice to take a break from stress. EDIT 09/16/10: I'm talking about the role of Charlotte in H20: Just Add Water Season Two. My audition was horrible, I was delusional.

So, I know what I want more...that's for sure.

Must go though, lots to do for tomorrow...have to get up sooo early...ugh, but yay! I'd get up at 3am and run down the highway for Charlotte...yes sirree!

Love Always & Latro The Boiled Kettle and The Clock-Wise Farm Cow.

Love from Charlotte. EDIT 09/16/10: Sigh. Oh Caitlin. Silly girl.

Apparently I have one hell of a global footprint - 2.33 planets! I am the Lizard Queen, indeed!

Originally posted on Buzznet.

I don't know if life got simpler. That was a pretty stupid thing to say. Nothing ever gets simpler. I don't believe that there is a simple life. Everything is hard, and when things are easy, there is always another challenge waiting around the corner for you. Life did not get simpler. After buying my PSP, and lots of other things I was staying away from buying I, of course, ended up broke. And I mean broke. I have no money, I am in debt to my grandparents for jeepers sake! I owe my Grandma like a $100, probably more than that, if she kept a tab.

But first things are first. Tomorrow I will audition for The Pajama Game, then I will email Tammy Gosling and ask her to help find me an administration job in the local area. Then I will think. Then on Monday I will be Charlotte, then go to work, where hopefully I will not be murdered by this drug dealer who wants to give me flowers. Heres hoping! :) Then on Tuesday morning, I will ring AEGIS Driving School and have a lesson hopefully on Wednesday or Thursday and then if it goes well, ask to be booked in for a test. Then hopefully I'll get the job (THE job? Geez, WHAT job!!!), quit 7/11 (escape the crazy drug dude), get my licence in however long it takes me to get it...hopefully first time, and then I'll have everyone off my back for a bit. Because I'll finally be getting full time pay, driving myself wherever and becoming an adult, which they have all been praying for.

Then, hopefully, I'll move out. Either with my Mum or with friends and become completely free for a bit. I'll learn how to cook more exciting things than just eggs (though I do cook a mean egg, well actually, it's rather nice. Quite swell. Absolutely spiffing!) and then I'll be able to audition for all those courses and workshops and schools and jobs and get in to all of them, and become great. Then after I've been great for a while, I'll go overseas and grow as a human being...increase my global footprint on the earth, which is apparently already 2.33 planets or something. Can you believe that...in this vast Universe two planets are mine!!! I shall name one Nemo, but I want most of them to be Caitlin Jnr.

No, I think if I had two planets to myself, I would call one: Alberfort and number two: Snozzberry World...and the races will be friends and fly their spaceships back and forth to see each other and have inter-galatic sex and the Alberfort people will have just eyes for faces and huge tongues and be called FezzleLoompers and the Snozzberry World people will have long blonde hair to their feet and huge tonails, that they dig with, and they shall be called SnizzCloppers! And the clouds would be real candy clouds, mmm, the sky would be blue jelly and the earth would be entirely edible...only on one planet, the Snozzberry World...so that the leading cause of death would be obesity, and people would try and escape to Alberfort, causing a terrible surge in population, resulting in mass polution and the extinction of many interesting creatures like the Able-Bodied DeedleBird and the JackingHammer Liger...

Well, if I am the God of those planets I've got to have some kind of plan don't I? I mean World Peace is so boring to watch...plus in a couple of trillion years when they are all wiped out, I can create purple people and dinosaurs that have tea parties! I mean that would be splendid wouldnt it? Just imagine the movie industry trying to turn THAT into a blockbuster...Jurassic Park 4: T-Rex meets the Teapot...it would never sell...damn...

Let's just all pray that I can be Charlotte on Monday okay? Would you pray for me please? I need to be Charlotte!

Love Always and Latro The Rectangle Phallis and The Yellow-ish Odour.

I am not going to the UK

Originally posted on Buzznet.

And so life got a whole lot simpler. It was just not working, everything was happening at the wrong time. When I am ready I will go though, if I don't I shall be very cross with myself.

At work today I had this starving guy ask for the thrown out pies and donuts, so I gave them to him and he was really grateful. He kept telling me I was a very beautiful person and how good it was of me to help out someone who would have gone to sleep hungry, then he said to Tony and I that he would bring us both a present.

That part I did not like. I am not that good a person. I am not good like those people who do spend every day of their life helping them. He promised Tony some marijuana. Well, how thoughtful of him. He probably wasn't at all that starving, he probably just had the munchies.

I felt really positive about life and then saw Harry and am now really depressed with it. I need a licence before I get another job. So, that is annoying. Especially because I really do need to get a manual. Boo. But I am going to learn how to cook, so that is one thing.

Oh, and I must enter the Quota Eisteddfod. I'll have to talk to Jo on Wednesday about backing tracks for some songs I need to audition for either The Pajama Game or Bugsy Malone, I should ask Jai what he is auditioning for. Oh, and I must call that lady from the Actor's Playhouse. I am going to audition for NIDA and WAAPA this year, how exciting.

My hobby part of life is all planned out and looking positive, my obligatory part is looking bleak and lifeless...maybe that is how I feel about it.

I actually like the movie Wedding Crashers. I watched it once and thought it was OK. I watched it on my PSP today and it was good. Oh yeah, in anger of the Panic! at the Disco tickets being all sold out, and annoyed that I saved all year for the UK and was now not going, I bought myself a PSP and it is really lovely. Quite swell, yes, indeed.

Anywhoo, it is 3am and in 12 hours I have to be at work again. Woah, that is an annoying feeling.

Love Always and Latro The Pineapple Donut and The Smokey Star Sign

It's Coming...Thats What He Said, Woo!

Originally posted on Buzznet.

Peggy Sue is coming.

She will follow me where ever I go, like she was supposed too when she flew in to my life.

I will commit myself to document through words and pictures and video of how mundane but interesting life can be...from the smallest bug to the largest cloud.

This is my promise.

You might not care.

But it matters to me.

I will see you tomorrow.

Oh, I quit my job weeks ago and am starting to dress like a lady again.

I'm growing up.

And Avenue Q will be performed!

Love Always & Latro The Wicked Popularity Contest and The SuckaSuckaSucka...

I can't leave until you get happy - SO GET HAPPY! BAM!

I think I'm being fired. Or I am just in a lot of trouble. I'll find out this morning anyway. Stupid me, renting out that game for free. Stupid GIR for making me have to swap shifts all the time. Stupid Blockbuster for making me even care that I might be getting fired. I think I don't like it because it is a sign of failure...I always wanted to leave Blockbuster when I was good and ready, not when they were ready to get rid of me. If I am being fired, I am going to do that display board first...I just want it to be done, even if she doesn't use it afterwards. I feel rather depressed thinking about this possible sacking...and nervous too, because I'm going to go down there this morning and apologize and ask what that note means.

Sarah and I are going to hang out this morning too. I'm going to go with her and her Mum to see how her ticket booking goes. Her parents bought her a ticket for November, and so I don't think I'll be going over there with her anymore, but it will be nice to have someone to greet me when I arrive later on. It's a bit annoying. I don't know if the world wants me to leave early or not, but I want to have a christmas at home before I go over.

I also saw this advertisement for SAE, who do courses on digital film production and film industry careers, and it was on the back of the Blockbuster magazine so I thought that it might be good to look in to it. And I did, and it looks pretty cool. I don't know what the prices are for studying there, but I do know that they have schools in the UK in Liverpool and London and Oxford and everywhere in the world. Brisbane too. So I'm going to look in to it, and try to get into a course there, because it would be very cool to get some good knoweledge and experience behind the scenes, so that I can be well rounded and grounded for anything. I know my career will be in the film industry. It's either that or theatre. I love it too much, I don't think I could go through life without being a part of it in some way. In front of the camera or sweeping the floors behind it. I think I would make a good director anyway. I've just got to get a bit better with words and describing words for emotions, because I find myself struggling to explain my emotions sometimes, and nobody listens to a rambling director...I've got to fill my head with knowledge and be able to explain ideas clearly and efficiently. I have got to buy myself a DV camera too. And not just before I go to the UK, but now so I can shoot some thoughts and use the programs I have on my computer that I only just realized were there, silly me.

EDIT 10/17/10: I didn't go to SAE. My friend Harry did buy my a DV camera for my birthday that year though.

Sarah and I are going to call up dance schools today, and go back to dancing to keep fit and keep ourselves well rounded in everything. I don't want Sarah to pike on me. I've got to get a licence, so if she does I can keep going, I'm really excited actually. It's going to be awesome to go back to dancing again...it will hurt quite a bit at first and be super embarrassing. But we are hopefully going to do some jazz classes first to get fit and flexible and then go on to do ballet and even tap. I would also love to join the eisteddfod classes again, that would be awesome! And imagine doing a concert again? Oh, the love! It would be so sweet!

EDIT 10/17/10: This never happened. I wouldn't take another dance class until 2010.

Oh, and I'm so going to have my 18th at the Dell Plaza Hotel, I'm going to call up the Party Bus and make sure they can travel that far, and then I'm totally going to book it. It's going to so sweet! This huge party room with a bar attendant and a security gaurd. And because everyone has to arrive and leave on the party bus at the same time, everyone will be together and it will be so fun. And there is a dance floor and lights, and a movie screen if we want to show any embarrassing Caitlin footage...I think I will just scan some embarrassing little pictures of me and then put all the videos and pictures I've shot of me and my friends on and just loop it all night. Oh, I'm so excited!

EDIT 10/17/10: This never happened either, though I do believe we seriously looked into it. I think I just had a party at home which was Football and Cheerleader themed, which was totally bizarre, because I dislike sports and have never wanted to be a cheerleader.

GIR rehearsals were a waste of my energy. I ended up crying on the way there because I missed my stop and I knew Blockbuster was mad at me, but I called my Mum and Darryl and they helped me get a bus to the right place, :). I love them very much. I've also been thinking about my Dad quite a bit and I think I might even miss him? It's a weird feeling to feel that, because I've never missed my Dad before.

When I finally got to GIR rehearsals I was 50 minutes late and nobody was there except for Ellah and Chris. Nobody got the email. After an hour, one girl turned up and we rehearsed the scene once and then played theatre games which we totally sucked at. And I looked crap and felt crap, and it was really annoying.

When I finally got home, Emily came over after a while, and she was balling her eyes out. She has been all alone lately, her cousins and roommates are away for one month and I think she is feeling a bit stressed out from being home alone.

So I made her stay home with me that night, and I woke her up in the morning and gave her tea and toast and I tucked her in at night and she seems much happier to of been mothered a bit, she even made me sit beside her and stroke her hair and tell her stories (well that was my idea) until she fell asleep. Poor darling, I really do think she has left home a year too early. I don't know why she just didn't stay at her house, but I'm glad she came over, it was good to see her, even though we didn't talk about much. She just swapped her alone story and I swapped my 'I think I'm being fired and I'm nervous' story. It was good to wake up early though, I went outside and breathed in the air and took photos of the morning sun.

I better start getting ready though, I've got to go down to Blockbuster and see what that note meant, pay off my late fees and apologize. I hate managers, they aren't human anymore when they get that title, they become alien, like they have forgotten that people have emotions and problems in their life, and they get consumed in their petty lives. EDIT 10/17/10: Compared to what? You're amazing and fulfilling life. Come off it, Caitlin. Like, Blockbuster, why would anyone want to make that a career??? A job, yeah. Career - hell no!

I'm pretty excited about the future, and pretty nervous too. You know, I hope I am being let go, I hope that I quit first so I don't have to put that I was fired on any records or anything. There is just so many better opportunities out there.

Moving Forward Fearlessly.

Love Always & Latro The Tired Kitten and Ever-Mothering Froglet.

P.S: Ooooooh, butterflies.

Well you're completely wrong you know, because I don't love you, because I don't love anyone. Because love is for girls and girls are disgusting. Because I'm a loner, I'm a crazy wide-eyed loner on a doomed space mission to Venus to do battle with the three-headed MegaBeast...but on the way there, I caught Cornflakes Disease....BLURGH!!!!