Tuesday 26 August 2014

Coming Soon to Caitlin's Brain

My Brain lately has been feeding me movie trailers as dreams. I have only been to the movies a handful of times in the last few months, so I didn't think I was over-saturated with content, but I guess I am.

Today's Brain Trailer was a Sci-Fi thriller.

Mashed between an insecurity dream where I didn't know my lines for a school pantomime of Alice and Wonderland, and a beautiful moment where I looked up to see Robin Williams standing before me in a crisp dark suit. He looked younger and so radiant. I grabbed his face, and then gave him a big hug, touched his face again and then ran away, leaving him obviously surprised. It was a beautiful moment...

BUT BACK TO THE TRAILER.

INT. FANCY HOUSE ON TOP OF A HILL. NIGHT.

A YOUNG WOMAN is babysitting her YOUNGER SISTER. It is twilight, but as soon as the beautiful afternoon colours light up their living room, they quickly disappear. The older sister walks outside and notices storm clouds gathering far away. As she walks around the house she comes across extremely low-hanging cloud. It is dark, like heavy smoke, she runs her hand through it caught up in the wonder of it -

BAM.

The older sister starts, looks around for the source of the sound-

BAM.

Running behind the house, and looking down into the valley, she sees a rocket launcher firing at something that she can't see.

BAM: CUT TO:

INT. ECONOMY SECTION OF PLANE. NIGHT.

A LARGE BUSINESSMAN, talking loudly and annoying our handsome LEADING MAN [Daniel Radcliffe, of course] is ignoring the heavy turbulence of the plane. Our hero is not, he grips his chair tightly, and looks out the window to see the play begin to angle steeply towards the ground, and then the rest of the passengers feel it, the plane is angling too far to not affect their books and coffees - and then he feels it before he sees it, and looks down, the ground is rushing up steadily towards them -

CUT TO:

CARS rush away from the storm into a tunnel -

CUT TO:

A JANITOR runs down a school hall away from an unseen force -

CUT TO: 

A BUSINESS WOMAN screaming in pain.

And then more flashes of crazy shit that has probably all come from enjoying the ridiculousness of the Into The Storm trailer...

BUT THEN: BLACK...

FADE IN...

The Young Woman and her Sister look around the house and outside at the world below them: DESTRUCTION. [Make sure you say it out and split it up with a deep movie-trailer voice:

DE - STRUC - TION

Feels good, doesn't it?]

CUT TO:

A collapsed underground tunnel filled with silvery steel going through various piled up and smashed cars and clinging to the walls of the tunnel.

CUT TO:

The business woman collapsed over her desk chair, to be pushed upright by an unseen person, to reveal that she is dead, with two small holes in her neck [VAMPIRE ALIENS???? OH, GOODY!].

CUT TO:

The Janitor, alive, but his limbs have been stretched into thick red vines and he is attached to the wall.

CUT TO:

Our Hero, is alive, he's still in the wreckage of the plane, his right arm and the limbs of many others have all been joined as one to the roof of the plane, creating a sick, twisted, red limbed tree. 

A AMBULANCE OFFICER is inspecting him.


HERO DANIEL RADCLIFFE

I've got to get out of here.

AMBULANCE OFFICER.

We're doing what we can.

HERO DANIEL RADCLIFFE.

No. Really. I've got to get out of here.

You can tell that he knows something. we. don't.

CUT TO:

More shots of red shit having absorbed various limbs and turned them into long red roots a la Tom Cruise's War of the Worlds.

TITLE: THE VAMPIRE-ALIEN STORM.

...

THE STORM OF VAMPIRE ALIENS.

...

ALIEN ROOTS.

...

...

Where's James Gunn when you need him...?

Thursday 21 August 2014

"Mattheu Almaric"

Date: 03/31/08
Time: 11:25AM

Someone must have told me about the brilliant Mathieu Amalric or... OR... I had just seen The Diving Bell and the Butterfly, which was suffocatingly beautiful... and I kindly wrote down his name the way I liked it. Isn't that thoughtful?

I suppose I planned to watch his films more closely. I did see Grand Budapest... but shit, I couldn't tell you what character he was off the top of my head in that wonderful whirlwind of a movie.

Let's make another list, his critically-acclaimed film performances:

• Le journal du séducteur (1996)
• The Blue Room (2014)
• On Tour (2010)
• Kings & Queen (2004)
• Heartbeat Detector (2007)
• Venus in Fur (2013)
• The Diving Bell and the Butterfly (2007)
• My Sex Life... or How I Got Into an Argument (1996)
• Un conte de Noël (2008)
• Munich (2005)
• Mesrine: Public Enemy #1 (2008)

Am I missing any classics of his? I added it to my IMDB Watchlist, so, like everything else, I'll get to it.

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Have All Notebooks Sent Over

Date: 02/26/08
Time: 4:06AM

When I was younger than 18, I began writing these Really Cool film ideas with Really Cool titles like:

Life 2.0

and

The Return to Hanging Rock

and

My Battle with the Elusive Mountain.

The best part is the note at the bottom:

*Work on Titles.

Yeah, no shit.

Life 2.0 would be about a young girl becoming a web star... Woo. Diary entry.

The Return to Hanging Rock would be a teen horror film where kids are inspired to go to Hanging Rock to hang out even though the events are total fiction... Or are they???

My Battle with the Elusive Mountain would be about this girl who really wants to climb Mt. Warning (which is actually a sacred site to the local Aboriginal people there, who don't want it to be climbed), but something always stops her from getting to the top: wind, rain, etc. She realises she's been cursed for trying to climb it (which is possibly offensive, nice work), and goes overseas to try to undo the curse... The side-story is that she is secretly in love with her best guy friend... Eventually she gets deported back to Australia, and the Guy Friend is all like: I guess you're still cursed...
and The Girl is all like: No, it must be broken, because it brought me back to you. And then they make out at the airport. Fade to black.

I also really wanted to write a Western Film that was epic on the scale of Pirates of the Caribbean but had musical numbers from popular song artists like Jeff Buckley, Muse, and The Killers. Ha ha haaaaaa.

My tips for writing a Western film were:

• Watch all movies.
• Read Scripts, Books, Online.
• Compile into a scrapbook where you can gather inspiration...
• Work quickly.
• Make it your hobby on weekends or [I love this part:] on lonely nights.

I never did let it occupy all my free time. What a pity. Let me know how you go writing your own Western with my expert advice!
-_-

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The Heroin Diaries - Kikki Sixx and Ian Griffiths

Date: 02/25/08
Time: 11:31PM

I wrote a note to myself to read this book.
It's been over 6 years... I have not read it.


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Totals